Road Trip Rough Transcript
Starring:
Keith!
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Mark!
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Lars!
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Chris!
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So, much better the 2nd time.
Much better. Wouldn't you say, funnier the 2nd time?
Ah, it did not have so much of your "ha ha" funny, but I did realize one thing: you didn't know what happened to that snake. Like, I was kinda wanting to see that guy-
Shoulda followed his shit, shoulda fucking killed him.
Not enough, uh, cock and balls... So yeah, it wasn't like, hilarious laugh out loud funny, just kind of a smooth ride the 2nd time.
And it had a moral.
It did?
That guys who do marijuana can actually do things for recreation?
"Man of the Year!"
"Get that bitch to make me some blueberry pancakes..."
Oh yeah, and, uh, once you take it in the brown you can never go back.
I love: "The End? That's the worst story ever!"
Love those dick jokes.
Love 'em.
Man, oh man... Yeah, definitely worth 3 bucks.
Especially since it wasn't even 3 bucks, we got in for free!
Movie Money, man.
Definitely worth nothing!
Old wrinkled Movie Money. Yeah I've got eleven dollars in the pocket thanks to that Movie Money.
Man, you gained money by watching a movie!
Thank you, Empire Theatres.
Fucking great!
{change of venue: Lars' car}
So what were we just saying?
Well we were talking about cock and balls!
No, before the cock and balls.
What, cops, and they suck?
Yeah, cops do suck, but we're talking about the movie. You were saying... what?
Kill-the-braincell movie. Cruise control.
Yeah. Like you were saying, you hafta downshift, put the mind on cruise control to really enjoy it.
Without cruise control: That movie fucking sucked! Yeah, more like... Daily Fuckheads!
They wouldn't know a good movie if it crapped in their mouths.
I've gotta say, I've always wanted to try and jump a car like that, what do you say boys?
That's definitely an awesome part right there...
{later, in the car}
This is raw fucking movie reviewing.
Yeah man, watch it, we're going through Crackton.
Crackton! Crackton is the stop, ladies and gentlemen!
...this is in the trenches man, fucking getting bullets dodging...
Man, pull over, variety.
Man, they've got a big fucking sign for the porn movies! D'you see that?
A big sign for porn movies?
Right in the window!
Fuck, you know what, that's what they need at-
Turn around, I want to see these porn movies!
That's what they need to have at the fucking 3 dollar movie. They have to have some serious porn. That was close, it had quite a few, quite a bit of tits, not nearly as much dick as fucking Scary Movie, which was so bad-
A little milking of the prostate...
There was a little anal penetration.
Yeah, it had tits but no bush.
That's the thing though with Scary Movie, like, it had tons of, like, pornorific stuff, but no actual tits...
No tits, just dick! Dick in the ear, dick in the ass, dick in the mouth! Too much dick! I mean, I liked the movie, I thought it was funny, but, too much dick.
But anyway...
Alright well, we're here.
Popcorn tastes like someone jizzed in it.
All right!
{End}
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