Starring:

Keith!

Chris!

Mark!

Matt!

Man, that was fucking nice.

That was fucking awesome.

That movie totally ruled. For like a retarded action movie with tits and babes, it did it perfect man.

And the thing was there wasn't really any boring parts or anything.

Gratuitous cleavage and ass shots, I'm like "Oh yeah!"

And fucking, "That's not funny. A buddy of mine was hit in the chest with a fighting muffin."

Mendoza!!

Just, "I think we should get married", Wham Wham Wham!

"Hey, were you in there when that happened?"

Remember when all those guys were following her, that real short dwarf guy, wasn't a midget but he was just this stocky guy with–

But that whole scene was so wicked, man. I couldn't be more pleased with how that went. And all the action scenes were fucking fake as hell but they ruled.

Like that part where he goes right through the fence, gets all thin.

Well fucking, that whole part where he jumps on the boxes spins around and unloads on them, that was fucking awesome.

That's probably the best fight in the movie.

Oh yeah.

That was just awesome that bitch just got hosed down, just, "Mendoza!!"

That was fucking hilarious!

That was the best part of the whole movie.

I dunno man, when those big ass black guys are talking to him...

I couldn't believe it though, I was like, holding back the laughs just so I wouldn't fucking like, you know–

Piss everyone off?

–and then, right after that all these people were laughing at all this shit that wasn't funny, I was like "Fuck you guys!"

Totally surprised by that movie, man.

And man when Drew Barrimore was in that fucking–

The race car outfit?

–the grease-monkey suit and fucking licked the steering wheel and shit man...

Tits everywhere, man!

You don't even need actual nipple when you've got that much tit. That was fucking nice.

That was definitely tit but no bush.

That movie knew where it's money was.

And just like the little parts where Lucy Lui would like, she was leaning over the fix the–

Now that was fucking nice!

Man, when fucking, when they had that slow motion jigglage...

Oh yeah! Fuck! That was nice!

Yeah, that was fucking nice! I just wanted to lick 'em.

Man, I can't believe we don't have the cheap theatre so we can go see that again.

That whole part where right after she wakes up in the morning and she's dancing around in her underwear...

That was definitely "Give the people what they want". And what the people want could only be...

The jiggling tits.

And the crazy action.

And the senseless slaughter... Man, that thiny, you notice they didn't even give a name to that thiny scary guy, always smoking. Like I kinda thought when they fight the main bad guy 'cause you see all the moves he's got, like oh yeah, he's gonna be a flyer...

Can you fight? No, I can't fight. But I can dance!

Fucking, that creepy, thin creepy guy was fucking cool, too. You know who that was?

No.

It was the guy from fucking Back To The Future.

What guy?

The first Back To The Future the dorky guy.

No way!

You're probably right, yeah! That McFly guy? No, that was–

It was McFly!

Isn't that what's his faces dad?

Yeah!

Marty's dad? So he truly was fly this time.

You know, if we hadn't said anything you would have gone to see The Grinch Who Stole Christmas.

I didn't want to go see that!

Whatever, man!

No way! My mom was thinking about going to see it, I'm like, "Sure, let's–"

No, I meant when we went in there, you almost went in the wrong fucking theatre!

Yeah!

I'm looking at the shit right on the menu!

You walk in there, you're watching it for half an hour, you're like, "There's not as much tits as I expected!"

I dunno who Jim Carrey is, but he's pretty hot.

Or you think it's just a preview. "Jesus, long preview!"

Tell the whole fucking story why don't you?

So, you see we were going in, and Chris managed to open the door properly for once in his life...

Burn!

And he was all proud about this! Then he got all distracted and went in the wrong theatre!

Drowned in a river!

Yeah...

{End}

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