BRAD!	DOWNLOAD THE MP3!	KEITH!

So I'm waiting for a cab, I'm gonna go see A Walk To Remember. With Shane West and Mandy Moore. Basically, I couldn't get anyone to go with me. Not a fucking soul. Except Brad. Yeah, so basically I'm, uh, I'm all by myself. With Brad. With Brad, yeah. Thank god, 'cause man if I had to go by myself- It's gonna be bad enough walking up to that ticket window, "Yeah, yeah I'll have a ticket to A Walk To Remember, please. Yeah that's right, I'm a complete faggot, unbelievably gay."

	after the movie

Basically the whole thing was the tale of the complete and total emasculation of Landen Carter.

Yeah, like he starts off, he's all being a dick and kicking sluts to the curb and stuff like that, y'know...

Slapping his dick in the mouth of them bitches that don't wanna act right.

Yeah, exactly. And then a girl in a frumpy dress comes along... Well, I have to admit, I've got a little thing going for the drumpy dress.

But that thing with the fucking lukemia, like, didn't they hear of foreshadowing?

No, yeah, exactly.

It's not like a terrible device, it works, but you gotta at least have some kind of clue. Not just out of nowhere.

Yeah, they did a good enough job making everything else in the movie predictable.

But I can't believe the two of them got married, like, I can't believe a man wrote that. Unbelievable. That was the awesomest part of the whole movie: "Alright, now, you're gonna work with the janitorial staff, you're gonna help kids learn and you're gonna be in the school play."

That was the best.

Don't line up anything else to do for the next hour and half, this is what you're doing. I dunno, I was hoping I could at least, y'know, come back and talk to all the nay-sayers and the doubters and say "Hey! You missed a kinda cool movie, y'know, for a crappy teen movie", but...

Yeah, I was hoping for that kind of thing, too.

But no chance. The Hardings were right to mock me.

	an hour later

It's been about an hour, so uh, final thoughts on A Walk To Remember? Piece of shit, y'thinking?

Unforgettable.